We just have differing view points. We are at a point where nothing I am going to say will resonate with you, and the same with I. You just look at things differently. I see your viewpoint on the Kremlin. I don't like Putin. I just take myself more as a realist. There is no "idealistic" ending to this. You can't reason with a madman who will sacrifice every last Russian man, and then some. Not to mention, the nuclear button. I am also realistic in the sense that he's not launching a nuke anywhere but Ukraine. Our intercontinental ballistic missile defense is beyond what your wildest imaginations can think up. Furthermore, to launch at a NATO block country is suicide.
Like you, I have a bit of inner experience in terms of how these things go. Especially proxy wars. Yemen, for example, which I can only speak that I do have first hand knowledge on. Not much more, unfortunately. When a proxy war is fought, the end goal for the "common good" outweighs the realistic picture on the ground. The ideal itself takes precedence over the actual human cost on those fighting it.
No one in the Pentagon believes Ukraine can "win" this war. Anyone who does is out of their mind. This isn't a Syrian conflict where surgical "advisors" are installed and direct action missions have an impact. There are advisors in country now, I know for a fact, but it's not the same. The "win" for this is really, stop Putin from taking the entire country. Crimea, the NW corner, etc will all likely go to Putin.
There's no sense arguing on this anymore because we just have differing viewpoints.
We obviously won't agree because you base your "realism" on what you believe and I base my analysis on what I know and can prove, leavened with a great deal of real world experience. Though I am sure you have led an interesting professional life, I have been professionally in every Middle East nation except Syria and Iran extensively (yes, including Yemen). I also speak Arabic with additional specialized training in the Arab peninsula dialect. I also suspect my range of contacts in my former profession are about as extensive as anyone. So let's you and I not employ the international men of mystery argument.
With respect to your sources in the Pentagon, I belong to fairly small fraternity of the graduates of that edifice. I can assure you the only thing frustrating the vast majority of the uniformed Pentagon leadership is the spinelessness of the Biden administration effort led by Jake Sullivan. We could have done so much more by now, and could still dramatically shift the correlation of forces in Ukraine in a matter of weeks and without introducing a single NATO advisor.
As an appointed officer, I subsequently ran a pretty substantial piece of a major defense corporation. I was part of the sector that builds the "
missile defense beyond what your wildest imaginations can think up." Regrettably, virtually all of that capability is readily available in the open press.
I think your description of Putin is largely correct except he is not mad. What he has done is make an enormous strategic miscalculation. But by your logic, we should allow him to recover from that and achieve his every strategic objective. To me that is true madness.
He will indeed sacrifice a lot of his military age population, but he doesn't dare call for general mobilization. By keeping the old Duchy of Moscow out of this war, he has made the contest far more equal in manpower. Yes, he will rattle his nuclear saber as he has for two and a half years, but he also realizes any strike against NATO would result in the utter and complete destruction of the Russian state, its culture, and its population. No one really knows how much of the Russian nuclear arsenal is viable after thirty years of neglect, but he can be certain every US weapon will work exactly as intended.
I am fairly confident we have provided him with an equally clear message should he utilize a tactical weapon in Ukraine.
On the other hand, I think we likely agree on the possible end state of this conflict. Unfortunately Putin is still far from that compromise, and will not budge until he knows the outcome of the election. There is very clear evidence that he believes Trump will force Ukraine into a settlement that grants Russia most of its strategic objectives. Whether Trump would do that is still open to question, but the evidence produced by his surrogates, including his VP pick, is giving Putin a great deal of hope.