You might be an African Safari hunter if……

If in the following week after you get back from your latest "once in a lifetime" trip, you're sitting in a meeting at work and find yourself day dreaming about being on the back of a bakkie swatting Tsetse's with a smile on your face. But then the smile goes away after you realize you're knee deep in a discussion of solder viscosity and you wished someone would put a 375 through your head.
 
I avoid wearing the safari getup while traveling. I do wear hunting clothes but they look more like something worn to work ... at a hardware store. My boots are inconspicuous. No camo or bespoke safari footwear. I've had people ask at the airport what's the long case for. "Saxaphone." If I was decked out in camo, I'm sure they wouldn't need to ask. I am a hunter but no need to advertise that I enjoy killing things. No Browning buck or Ducks Unlimited decals on my Jimmy's back window.

Guess I'm just not into branding myself. But that's just me.
Or when you are in line at the Joberg airport and someone points to your tuffpack gun case and asks how the golf is……..
 
If you stand out on your front porch at night confusing coyote howls for: ________ sounds.
hyena,
African dog,
Leopard,
Lion,

If you look at your cat and see a meerkat.

If you look at you neighbor's black Angus bull, judging it like at cape buffalo.
 
Sitting in Joberg airport waiting to get on my plane to Atlanta after a wonderful plains game hunt. (Hunt report will be posted after I have a chance to absorb all that happened)
Got to thinking it might be fun to start you might be a African Safari hunter if thread:

I will start. You might be a African Safari hunter if you wear your hunting boots on the plane and you look for other hunting boots at the airport.
If you hear someone using a rip saw to.cut a board and the first thing you think is it's a leopard calling.
 
When alk your socks have grass seeds

For me that falls under You might be a redneck if __________.

Cause I often go outside in my socks (or barefoot) rather than put on my shoes for a quick trip to the garage, my truck, or out to the porch.
 
A few more......

If you sneak up on random range cattle to see how the crosshairs of a .416 Rigby might look on buffalo prior to the hunt. (I always wondered how the conversation would go if the rancher suddenly appeared.)

If you understand that an 80 pound elephant is an enormous animal.

If you marvel at the many hunters who are afraid to venture over the pond, even when they easily have the means.

If you keep looking for a perfect rusk recipe.

If seeing the sun in the north makes you smile.

If miniature antelope with 4" horns get your heart pumping.

If everything you eat is compared to blue wildebeest tenderloin.

If you dream of raising wildebeest, just for the meat.

If you laugh when people tell you they'll probably only make the trip once.

If you call it a three-three-eight, or a three-seven-five.

If you have more than four taxidermists.

If you know more about international freight procedures than anyone else in town.

If you fantasize about buying a game ranch in Africa.
 
Yeah another one of those keep em guessing.

Woke: He's smiling. He must like me.

Me: I really want to strangle them. Snap their neck like a dry twig.
I'm okay if the guy at Starbucks is smiling and looking at me ... unless his hands are in his pockets. "I've changed my mind. No cream in my coffee."
 
When you are hunting mule deer with a 404 Jeffery.

Trick out a Dodge Ram into a Hilux by mounting an air breather snorkel up the side of windshield post. Amazing what one can do with duct tape and dryer vent hose. Move over Red Green!
 

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