Australia’s ‘Chief Woman Greenie Tree-Hugging Activist’, was climbing a tree to have a look out over the forest when a Tawny Frogmouth Owl attacked her for invading its nesting site.
In a panic to escape, she slid down the tree, getting a great number of splinters  lodged in her crotch area. In considerable pain she  hurried to the nearest doctor, told him she was an environmentalist and how she got all the splinters.
The doctor listened with great patience and then told her to go into the examination room and he would see if he  could help her. 
She waited for 3 hours before the doctor reappeared. Angry, the woman demanded, “What took you so long?”
“Well...” replied the doctor, “I  had to get permits from the  Environmental Protection Agency; the Forestry  Service; the National Parks and Wildlife Service; the Wilderness Society and the Department of Conservation and Land Management before  I could remove “old growth timber” from a “recreational area” . . .  I’m  sorry but they all turned me  down!”