Oxford university scientists have discovered the densest element yet known to science
The new element is known as Governmentium (symbol Gv)
It has one neutron. 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons which are surrounded by vast quantities of lemming-like particles called pillocks
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert.
However, it can be detected, because it impedes every action with which it comes into contact.
A tiny amount of Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years
It does not decay, but instead undergoes a re-organisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places
In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons forming isodopes
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass.
When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many pillocks but twice as many morons