on a lighter note...

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When You're 70 & a Veteran

I was standing at the bar at the VFW one night minding my own business.
This fat ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said,
"You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?"
I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?"
She said, "Yeah, I got a pen".
I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."
Cost me 6 stitches . . . but when you’re seventy -- who cares?
**********
I went to the drug store and told the clerk "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."
Lady Clerk: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?”
I said "Nah -- She's pretty good lookin' . . . . . . "
When you’re seventy -- who cares?
***********

I was talking to a young woman in the VFW last night.
She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right.”
I said, “If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”
Cost me a fat lip, but when you’re seventy -- who cares?
**********

I was telling a woman in the Club about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts.
"Really" she said, "Go on then . . . try."
After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"
I said, "Yesterday."
Cost me a kick in the nuts, but when you’re seventy -- who cares?
*********

I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
When you’re seventy -- who cares?
 
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Preparing for the adventure of a lifetime. Looking forward to my 2026 Africa hunt with Van Wijk Safaris in South Africa.
Monster Free range Common Reedbuck!!
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What a great way to kick off our 2025 hunting season in South Africa.

This beautiful Impala ram was taken at just over 300 yards, took a few steps and toppled over.

We are looking forward to the next week and a half of hunting with our first client of the year.
Handcannons wrote on Jaayunoo's profile.
Do you have any more copies of African Dangerous Game Cartridges, Author: Pierre van der Walt ? I'm looking for one. Thanks for any information, John [redacted]
 
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