Two men setting on a park bench.
Man 1: Now that the country is starting to open up and people can get back to work during this Coronavirus, I lost 285 pounds in one day.
Man 2: Really? How did you lose 285 pounds in one day?
Man 1: Well...I got up at an earlier than normal hour, had my first good shower in 6 weeks lost 2 pounds, shaved my 6 week beard off lost 3 pounds, went to the barber shop had the barber to cut my hair back to normal and lost 10 more pounds.
But the biggest weight loss 260 pounds, came when my once fit and trim wife of 20 years, who by the way, gained nearly a hundred thirty pounds during self quarantine, and I went to court this morning and the judge finally granted us a divorce.
Man 2: Amazing! Was that you in the second row in the courtroom? I lost 310 pounds the same way.